To the white folks who commented, wondering what to do. Every attempt to de-invisibilize white privilege starts with and depends on an attempt to understand and empathize with the day-to-day experiences of people of color.

Our privilege only appears to us in tandem with our willingness to feel into the experience of people who don’t enjoy the same privilege.

Whether or not we agree with every point made by the author might not be as important as our willingness to open our hearts and minds. To see and to empathize. That is the origin of real change, in my opinion.

We may be afraid of seeing our privilege, or angry that we are asked to do that, or we may feel helpless. But we can always open our hearts and try to cultivate a more intimate encounter with others. We can learn about the experience of others.

Bell Hooks wrote long time ago that people “on the margins” have a kind of double vision: they see themselves, but they are also forced, as a matter of self-preservation, to study the people in the center, the people with more power. So they are actually wiser than those in the center.

What we can do, how to begin, is to start getting wiser, to start studying back.

Hair pulling and self worry can be another form of self-centering. Non-histrionic self examination in tandem with sincere attempts to truly see others, as this lovely article demonstrates, help us to heal and re-build our lives together.